Nameless.

I am nobody. To you, that is.

I am alone. After all, I am only the girl who sits behind you. I doubt you even know my name. Perhaps you don't even look behind you to know that I exist.

I am trapped in my own little bubble, watching the people around me laughing and talking. I wait. I have the only private bubble, but I don't see that as a good thing.

I am alone.

I am the girl who sits behind you.

Remember me in black-and-white if you must, but don't forget me. Because perhaps one day you will be the girl who sits behind me, alone.

Things change.

To dance in the rain.

It is so tempting to be the girl who dances in the rain.  The kind of girl who wears vintage skirts and jean jackets and her mother’s perfume.  The kind of girl who everyone knows, but no one understands. 

            This is just one side of unique.  The reaches of “unique” stretch far and beyond this one image planted into our minds.  To be honest, any girl who tries to fit within this one definition of uniqueness is not unique, for she is only copying the generations of such girls before her. 

            To dance in the rain, to laugh, to be different—none of these things are bad at all.  What you do is important, yes.  But even more important are the reasons behind those actions.

             

Faceless.

Inspired by a conversation with a friend. :)

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On the Internet, you can say whatever you want. There is a code of anonymity, of facelessness. What you say and who you are can be two completely different things, if you wish. There is safety behind the mask of obscurity found on the Internet. Behind this mask, you are safe from the judgements and objections of the rest of the world.

Online, you can speak the truths that you could only dream of speaking in real life. You can use your anonymity to express the ideas that no one else might care about. Or, you can use your anonymity to tear down others' shelters of self-confidence. It is your choice.

But online, you are faceless. You are free. And how you use that power is up to you.

Coeur.

I obviously cannot create quality titles--something to work on this year :3 I wrote this story during the summer... Enjoy!

~~

In the city of Coeur, there was peace and beauty. It was a lovely place, filled with lush gardens and grand buildings. All the people lived in happiness and peace, and it was good and beautiful. Coeur was a special place--everyone knew that much. Nobody was quite sure why it was so special, but everyone wanted to live there. Reaching such a perfect place was not simple, though. For Coeur was hidden inside a huge range of mountains, a tiny city dwarfed by the giant grandeur of nature.

But one day, to this small city of Coeur, there came a traveler. Although the journey to Coeur was long and difficult, he came looking as if he had simply taken a leisurely stroll along the city streets. He wore a mask, and clothing dark as the night. Behind the mask, though, was a handsome face--that much everyone could tell. His genteel manner and kindness to all quickly won over the inhabitants of the city. Why shouldn't this well-mannered traveler live out the rest of his days here, in perfect peace and happiness?

So he became one of them. Spoke like them, acted like them. But he kept his dark clothes and mask, so that nobody really knew who he was. At first no one was willing to trust him. They said, "He hides himself with a mask! His clothes are darker than the night! If he does not see fit to share his identity with us, why should we give him our trust?"

But his refined ways eventually won them over. "Perhaps we do not really know who he is, but he is a good man," they began to say. And they accepted him as one of their own.

One day, many years later, he became the mayor of Coeur. The most powerful person in the city.

But everything changed one night. One night, the city woke up to flames. Bright golden fire, devouring all the beautiful buildings and homes and everything that made Coeur lovely. And the masked mayor was gone, along with everything beautiful in Coeur. The city was burning, in agony and chaos. Surely this must be death itself, because nothing in life could hurt this much.

This masked man, the one whom everyone had trusted--he had, in one stroke, destroyed every good thing in Coeur.

This masked man had destroyed the heart of the city's beauty. The city of the Heart, broken beyond repair by a single man in a single night.

{Coeur means "heart" in French}.

Hello out there.

If you're actually reading this post/my blog, you're an amazing person :D

Anyways, I understand that my ramblings about the meaning of life and such may not necessarily interest you forever. I've been trying to come up with other things to post here, and have been failing miserably. However, do expect an influx of short stories/poems. Hopefully. :) Enjoy, and again, thank you for reading!

To all those affected by 9/11/01.

I could argue that this entry applies to anyone. However, I am choosing to speak to those directly affected--who lost a relative, a friend, or who has suffered because of that day.

I cannot possibly know what it would be like to be you. I cannot feel your pain or your sorrow. I cannot know what it must be like to have a hole in your heart that may take decades and ages to fill. If this is not you, and you have healed and moved on, I congratulate you. To those of you who have not, I wish you only the best.

September 11, 2001, was a terrible day, and this sentence is a terrible understatement. It rocked America to its core. Yet it brought this country together in a way that nothing but a disaster of that scale could. And so perhaps those lives lost and scarred were worth it, but only in the long run. It's too bad that to benefit only in the future means a time of suffering in the now.

And so I wish you the best and only the best. I wish you healing and comfort and joy in life, and I pray that God will mend you. I have never known what it is like to suffer that deeply--because of what heroes have done, both on 9/11 and on every other occasion necessary. I am blessed. We all are.

mirror.

and you carry everything inside 
black inside, gleaming white outside
the disguise is all for everyone else. 
because you can only look back and you
wonder what went wrong. 
because something changed
something's broken.
your heart, you think.
something isn't right and you don't know why
but you wish you did
because then you could fix it.
you could make it all right again
but you only have the memories now. 

Once upon a time.

Once upon a time, a younger version of you lived in the past.  And it was pleasant and good, but you didn't realize it at the time.  You wanted to be older--to grow up and to enjoy all the wonderful things that would come with growing up.  You wished that you could be older than you were, that you could be in the future already, that the wonders of the future could be yours right now.

And then you did grow up.  You reached the future that you had dreamed of, and you realized that it wasn't as amazing as you thought that it would be.  You realized that life was sweeter and simpler in the past.

Once upon a time, you wished for the past again.  The present is not quite as lovely as one might imagine.